The Lady Wore Black...............................

Ok, note to self, I need to stop scheduling early morning meetings, as I am getting tired of getting up early!! I have another 10am meeting tomorrow!! Why oh why do I do this to myself?? I think because I can then have an early day and go home early, but right now, I think I would opt for the later schedule...

I was late today anyway by 1/2 hour....But my boss was cool with it and we met at 10;30 am instead. Our meetings went well, although I was much depressed as I didn't get to go to Sephora as I so hoped, but then on my way home pouting about the non Sephora day, I realized I can go tomorrow!! There is a new Sephora in Novato, so on my way to the climbing gym, I can swing over to Sephora and have loads of makeup fun!!!! Yeah!!!!

So in other news my poor precious girl ( my oldest dog) has run out of her incontinence pills...And I could have sworn the vet said that it was just the one lot of pills she needed to take, but as she has run out, she again is starting to pee at unexpected times after dinner. The vet said it is because of when she was spayed as a young dog, and now her syphincter (have no idea how to spell that)is loose. And the pills help to tighten her syphincter. So at some point tomorrow, I need to get her more syphincter pills....My poor precious girl, at the moment she looks so sad, and everytime she feels movement in her lower extremities she gets up and runs away from herself. Like to say "that wasn't me, I didn't do that!!"

And in the last bit of news worthy happenings today, my boss asks me, "why do you wear so much black", and I replied, " why is there a problem with me wearing black?" to which she says, "Oh no, you just look like one of those gothic people...." Now I find when people ask me this question, it is a bit baffling as I never ask someone that wears a lot pastels, or bright bright colors, why they wear so much color....., however I get this question a lot, just like when people find out I have been married for so long and I don't have children. Well why don't you have children?? Can you not have them??? Now if I couldn't, wouldn't you think this would be very upsetting to me?? So I find the best way to handle this question re: children, is the reason I don't have children is because I don't like them..... They either laugh at this or look so horrified. Is there a problem with being honest, you were nosing around in my business wanting to know why I don't have them. And then I usually get, well you don't really mean that,,,,, why not, some people don't like dogs or cats, and they choose not to have them, I don't like children, so I chose not to have them. Simple. I am just the gothic black clothes wearing non breeder.

If Only Tonight We Could Sleep

Today went pretty well, met with my client and helped her unpack products, set up the tester units, and set up follow up meetings to get her business rolling..

Then I played hookie the rest of the day and met up with Satan at the gym to do some birthday climbing!! I had two good falls, the first one, I clawed the wall half way down, it sounded like I was falling down a chalk board, it was pretty funny, as it was basically me and Satan, and two other climbing couples in the gym so when I took the fall, it echoed around the gym. The second fall wasn't as dramatic, but it still sounded loud. Satan also took some falls, and when he falls, it lifts me up off the floor, which is always amusing. We climbed for at least two hours.

Tomorrow is another early start as I actually have to meet up with my boss at 10:00am. So I will have to have my boss in my car all day. Luckily she is pretty cool, and if we are by a Sephora I can always get her to do some shopping!! And yes, we will be by a Sephora tomorrow as there is one on Union St, and our 2pm appt. Is across the street from Sephora, so that should be a good shopping day then!!

But being I have to get out of here early tomorrow, if I want to get some exercising in tomorrow, , if I really feel like being in an exercise mode, I need to get up early and exercise. Hmm, seems good now, but tomorrow morning at 5am will be another story,, to sleep a little longer or to exercise...Especially if my insomnia is still with me tonight.....

Just A Quickie.....

So this is to be a quickie as I am trying to be on time today, as I have to meet a client at 10:30, to help her set up her store and help her merchandise everything. I am actually looking forward to this as I enjoy setting up displays and shit, it is the most creative part of my job. I then need to schedule a time to work with her on working on her business plan as she is starting a new business. That will probably be next week, as today needs to be just getting everything unpacked.

It is also Satan's birthday so I have a date with him to go climbing in the afternoon. He is taking the day off. Which he only informed me over the weekend, when I had already made plans for today, and I can't reschedule. He never takes his birthday off, but I guess turning 33 today is a celebration. Well, good for him, as he usually is a workaholic, so it is nice to see he actually takes days off.

I had insomnia last night, I had a feeling I was going to. And usually when I get insomnia it stays for about 3 days, so I have two more nights of this. I think maybe it has something to do with the moon. I usually have trouble sleeping around a full moon, and seeing that it is on Friday, that would make sense. Maybe I am part werewolf. Hmmm. Not hairy enough to be one.

Ok, best go sing happy birthday to Satan, then off to work, so unfortunately, there will be no blogging for me until I get home this evening!! Damn work, it gets in the way of everything!!

Thunder Only Happens When It's Raining

No it doesn't!! As at this moment, there is a huge thunder storm going over head, and no rain in sight. Just ugly black clouds and lightening. And poor Ghost is very upset about the thunder storm. She is hiding under my desk whining.

OH, that's why I have a headache and my back is hurting, its the storm,,,,duh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sometimes I can be so clueless.

Well, I made Satan his birthday cake, and I must say it looks pretty sad. I ran out of icing to inscribe a happy birthday slogan, so instead I spelled it out in chocolate chips, however you can't really read it...Oh well, it's the thought that counts!!

Ok, feeling like I am a lightening bolt target, as all of the metal in my teeth are on edge, so I think I will be signing off now, and going into the crypt for safety!! Let me just make sure I have some cheese in there with me.......

Hocus Pocus

Why am I addicted to this movie?? It is not even that good. However, whenever it is on, I find myself watching it. And at 7:20 in the morning it comes on, so I have been sitting there for an hour immersed in this movie. Luckily for me I am in my home office today, or it would be yet another late start!!

I also sat and watched Salem's Lot the mini series on TNT this weekend...Twice....The first time was on Friday when it first aired, then Satan came home and said that he wanted to watch it, so we found that it was playing again on Saturday afternoon, so we marked it to watch, and what did I end up doing for 4hours on Saturday, but watching the same movie I had just watched not even 24 hours prior....The mini series was ok, but was most disappointed at the end when they started making the vampires walk around like zombies, so Rob Lowe and kid could get out of town in a hurry. So very disappointed in that, as earlier in the movie the vampires were flying around..And suddenly they are roaming and moaning like zombies WTF?

I did manage to clean the house this weekend, in between movies that is... So at least the house is clean. And today at some point I have to bake a birthday cake for Satan, as his birthday is tomorrow. I usually just go and buy a cake, but something twisted in me decided to be domestic and bake him one. What was I thinking...Oh well, least there will be chocolate frosting from a can for me to consume today.....Not that I need it, but because it is there, and as I never buy frosting from a can, it is more tempting than ever to eat it!

Oh shit, I have a conference call with my manager that's going to be starting in a few moments, I forgot about that, so now I need to hurriedly get some bullshit together to talk to her about!!

Waking the Dead

I am having a slow start to Saturday, but since the last couple of days have been slow starts I guess I just need to role with it. Thanks again Liz for helping me out with my links last night, I am very low tech (unlike Jen, she is high tech, baby) with computers, sometimes I need help trying to figure out how to turn it on!

Anyway, so far I have checked my $$ in my checking account, so now I am staling to pay the bills. It is nice to see the amount in my checking, so why make me sad by writing bills now..... As the mortgage is due on this cycle o' bills.

Oh and I gave myself a mini facial this morning which was quite nice. I do need to find a good facialist here in the bay area, as I think flying to LA once a month to get one is going to be a bit hard on the check book, and one expensive facial in the long run.

Well, it sounds like the girls are getting restless and need to have their ball thrown for them, as Satan is still asleep....but not for long as I am going to go wake his ass up, which should not be a pretty sight, as waking up Satan is usually not a good thing.........but what the hell, I am up for a good laugh!!!!!!!!!Wish me luck!!!

Living Dead Girl

I knew my good day yesterday (see previous blog) would only be for one day. Today I awoke to monster cramps! And they are still here, 3 hours later!! I have taken the exceeded amount of ibuprofin and I have a heating pad on as we blog and alas they are still here, if there is anyone out there that has a remedy for mondo cramps, do tell!!
Also from the fab climbing I did yesterday, my left arm is now sore and I can't lift it more than boob height.

However I did wake this morning in a spoon sandwich! Satan was angelicly sleeping (he only looks this way when he sleeps) spooning me, and I was spooning my littlest pup ( she was on top of the covers, sorry no beastiality here). If only the cramps weren't around, I could have enjoyed it more.

It looks as though today is going to be another late start, but hey, at least it's Friday!!

A Pretty Good Day,,,,How Did That Happen??

I actually had a pretty good day today, they actually do come along once in awhile so here are some highlights:

1. I actually got carded at beverages and more!! Not a big deal to some, but since I haven't gotten carded in ages this was a major happy moment!!

2. This woman at one of the accounts I went to today said I looked like the chick from Evanecense (don't know how to spell it). Not a bad comparison, as she is probably 16 years younger than me and she has really cool hair!

3. I went to the climbing gym today and had a ton of energy and climbed really well!! I actually made it up all the climbs I attempted!!

4. I was late getting to work, but then realized I don't have a boss watching over me, so no one knew I was late!!

5. On the way home I realized it's Friday tomorrow and its pay day!!

so lets all hope that tomorrow isn't pay back for an actual pretty good day! But how could it, it's Friday tomorrow after all.....................

Rebel Rebel Bitch Bitch........Blah Blah Blah

I was going to write this blog last night, however Satan decided to interrupt my blogging as he needed help. Men. Don't they understand about surfing the blog sites??

Anyway,,,yesterday I went to an education class at work where salons can also attend. I was looking forward to the class as it was going to be a good business coarse for me to help get my business up and running, well, it was going pretty well until this old bitch of a woman decides to become the heckler of the class and start questioning everything the instructor is trying to tell us,, and then in the middle of the class the old bitch says to the instructor," I have been in this business for 20 years, how long have you been in this business because I could tell you a thing or two!"

Alright psycho bitch if you have been in this business for 20 years, what the fuck are you doing in a basic business coarse?? Obviously you haven't been very successful or you would be the one running this class!! So of course because of her bitching and complaining the whole way through the class gets out late, and then she had the nerve to leave early because she had an appointment she couldn't miss, well bitch if you had kept your trap shut we all would have been able to leave early, but because of you we are all late!! So I will probably take the class again as the last part was so rushed to get us out of the class as close to on time as the instructor could, but that is just fucked up. We all had to suffer because of psycho bitch hating her life.

Why do people do that?? I just don't understand why other people love to squash others with their own horrid miserable life and experiences. They can't be happy at all for anyone. She reminded me of some of the old hags I used to work with on the makeup counters. And I vowed to get out before I ever turned into one of them. And thank god I did!! As the Black Eyed Peas say, Where is the love??

A Sweet Girl in Wolf's Clothing

My dogs are nut cases. But I love my little nut cases. Ghost loves puppies, our next door neighbor has two new lab puppies, and so she went hysterical over them. High pitch howling ( she is part husky part wolf) at them all wagging her tail, well, did they think she was running over to say hi? No, they go running off all scared as this looney tunes dog comes running at them. Oh ghostie, nobody understands you are too over the top when it comes to puppies. She followed little willow around ( the youngest girl) like she was the best thing ever when we first got her until she got out of her cute puppy stage. Now she looks at her, and then looks at me longingly like she is saying, "can we please trade her in for a new puppy"??

Ghost has yet to see the new puppies down the road as there are about 7 of them, if she did I don't think I could ever get her home from our walk, she would have her head plastered at the fence just looking at them all day.
However my poor Ghostie is just misunderstood as everyone we pass by thinks she is scary. Which is good when you are on a walk with her and there is a creepy guy near by. But nobody understands how sweet she really is. Until she becomes the stealth bird murderer......

Girl Daze.....................

Today was a total me girl day. I went and got my hair colored, way to many grey hairs showing too mention, then off to get my manicure. It was great. Too bad work gets in the way as I have a conference call at 4pm today. Why I ask you on a Friday, don't they know I have my own stuff to do.....

Nothing else to blog about, but I am so ready for the weekend, I think I may just sleep starting right after the conference call, but more likely, I will be sleeping before I get off the call as they are usually so boring and other people decide to rant way to long on these things, don't they know we don't want to hear about their problems, so why don't they just call our manager for some one on one time, and don't drag us into their problems. What the fuck it's 4 fuckin o'clock on Friday, do we really care?????????????????????????????????

The "Real World" cast of loonies

I can't believe I am finally back from my 10 training in LA. That was the longest fuckin 10 days of my life. Thank god Liz came down for the weekend or I think I would have gone mad. However this past week and a half felt like a real world episode, as the 5 other people I had to be with for the full trip were so completely different from each other. And of course I was singled out as the "weird" Goth chick. I was definitely the "Frankie" of this group. There was the "normal" one of the bunch who was a mom from Reno (although she had some Reno mall hair happening), then we had the over 40 divorced single mom ( who looked like the chick who was the mom on who's the boss) who was "sweet and innocent" on the outside. But there was a raving party girl in there once she had a couple of drinks, then there was the southern bell who was the prima donna of the group, as this was her trip, and we were mere servants to wait on her hand and foot. Then we had the anorexic who we never saw eat as she would disappear at lunch time and never came out with us for dinner. However the two times she did come out with us and she ate, she then spent about 20 minutes in the bathroom right after the meal, and she was always cold and wore a coat (even when the air conditioning was out and we were all feeling like we were in a sauna). Then last but not least we had "I want One" girl, who came for the last week of training, and everything I had she had to make sure she got one too. Even down to the flipping welcome bag that was just for us new hires ( she wasn't one she was there for retraining), and she was like living with a nervous rodent. So needless to say, I am so glad to be back in the realms of my own psychoness. However the training I got was really good, and made me really want to pursue this new career path I have chosen. So knowing that, I was able to survive my real world cast for the last 10 days. However, I know if it was a "real world" series I would have been the one to go mental on someone. Probably either the southern bell, as I was getting sick of her shit, or it would have been the "I want one" rodent girl, as she was just a freak.

Am I Forgetting Anything???

Ok, so now I am packed, suitcase is in car, and now my mind is racing a mile o minute thinking I have forgotten something, and then thinking, should I bring two cases instead of one, as the one is full and rather heavy. Will I be getting more crap to bring back with me, and then am I going to need another bag to bring back with me. Will this obsessesive compulsive behavior ever stop?? AAAHHHHHH!!!

Ok, just breathe, it will be fine, and if I have forgotten something it isn't like I am going to another planet (although LA is out there), where I wouldn't be able to find the same crap as I have here at home. OK, I am fine now, these panic attacks are at least getting shorter.

Well hopefully I will come back fully enlightened on this new career path I have chosen and full of enthusiasm to get out there and actually do something.....we shall see.....

Leaving on a Jet Plane....

I have packed my suitcase already which is good, now I am just trying to remember everything else I need to do before I go. Glad to hear Liz will be coming out next Saturday to visit, otherwise I would be bored as hell, as I am not the type to go out and explore on my own. And hanging out with coworkers who I have had to work and live with this next week, is not my idea of a fantastic time. I definitely need me time. I have discovered why I actually enjoy my work is because I am alone a lot and I like that. It's when I have to deal with people too much that I start to get annoyed.

So on my quest for happiness, (I find this an interesting concept as most goth's I have run into like the sad and dark side of life more) I need to start appreciating what I have. I am an individual who always keeps thinking of getting to the next step or the next day or the next whatever and not enjoying or appreciating what I have right now. I did this a lot in my 20's and I can't really remember what it was I was searching for back then. However I did meet Satan in my 20's which was unexpected as I didn't plan on meeting my future husband on vacation the way I did, however, that worked out well, and I wasn't searching for him. So that could be the answer to my quest, stop searching and start enjoying what I have.

This is how I will be looking at the next week, stop wishing it to be over already and enjoy and learn from the experience, as if this is the career path I want to do, I might as well enjoy the journey. So as my blog says I am on that Bridge to Nowhere and when I cross it, will I be happy that I got there or will the journey across it be the most interesting part of it. Ok I think I woke up this morning being too much in my head........

So my plans today have changed. I had one of my appointments cancel on me, which I don't mind as I didn't want to drive all the way to the city today for a half hour appt. But now I am so unmotivated to do anything. This is so my problem. I could sit and watch TV all day, but what a waste of a day. Especially when I have so much crap I need to do before I leave on Sunday for training. So I am going climbing today with Satan, unless he calls and says he doesn't feel like it and is coming home early. It would just be my luck. As I need to get some climbing in, as I won't be able to climb while I am at training.

Well I did put a load of laundry in, so at least my clothes will be clean before I leave. I did walk the dogs today too. And Satan told me I coddle my youngest dog too much, and now she is a wuss. Can't help it, she is just so damn cute and needs hugs, and she likes hugs. But she follows me around all the time now, which I don't mind, but I think Satan may feel like the dog is not paying enough attention to him. As she used to follow him everywhere when she was a puppy. But I am sure the roles will reverse when I leave on Sunday, and when I am back in a week and 1/2, she will give me the cold shoulder.

So I am obsessing over the dogs while I will be away. Not Satan, I know he can take care of himself, its just my darling girls I will miss. I keep telling Satan he needs to talk to them and do stupid things with them like I do while I am gone so they won't feel abandoned. He said anarchy will happen while I am gone, and they will all be living the life... Most amusing.

So anyway, back to my original rambling,,, I get side tracked a lot, its pre alsheimers, I just know it.... Anyway I am canceling the other meeting I had today which is the one for the school. Again, don't want to drive all that way for that, and I can reschedule, so when I call to cancel I will rebook for when I am back, as not to pass this opportunity by. As when I spoke to Satan about it last night he thought it was a good idea to check into it as well. Ok, must get motivated to do something.......

What do I want to be when I grow up????

So I am finally going to get my esthetics license. How long has it taken me to figure out what I want to do when I grow up. I went to talk to a school today and will probably enroll in the next couple of weeks. As they do parttime classes which would work for me, as I still have to work full time to pay for it. But it will nice to finally be free of a "boss" and have just me to deal with. Although, dealing with myself can be quite trying sometimes.

I find that I obsess about getting older, and to think that I am looking down the road at the big 4...0 in the next couple of years has me wondering what there is to my life, and what have I done with it that I have been happy with. I remember when I turned 30 I just obsessed that I was 30, but now that 40 is on it's way I am looking back to see what I have done with my life and where do I want to go with it??

So this will be an adventure in finding out what I am all about I guess, as that vampire didn't come along at 25 to give me eternal youth, that I was really hoping on, but now I will have to find it on my own. I think I am on a quest for eternal youth and eternal happiness. It has to be out there.....And I will find it DAMN IT!!

Anyone out there???

So here I sit and ponder the first blog. I am no longer a blog virgin. but will there be anyone out there to experience the joy of it?? So nothing to report, my first blog and I am already boring myself..this is pretty sad. So how did I get here, and where am I supposed to go?? That is my never ending question.. What am I supposed to do with this life? And how many of these lifetimes have I already lived? So many questions.....Ok my brain hurts so I think it is off to do something extraordinary....like sleep.