Smells Like Children

as Pisser wanted to hear the story, I shudder as I write this just thinking about what happened yesterday:


Yesterday was my one and only day off, so it was spent lounging around in the morning, hanging out with Liz, starting my seedlings for this coming years veggie garden, taking many naps on the couch, while Satan watched the super bowl.......

So I am sitting on the couch next to Satan, and we start talking about waxing, and that he will actually let me wax his eyebrows (not girl like, just clean up the evil brows) so I am all excited as I have been asking for months now if I could practice on him, so finally the day is here!!! I get out my wax pot, and am getting everything ready.....when there is a knock at the door.............

It is about 5:00pm, and I am thinking, who the fuck is at our front door, seen as how nobody comes down our driveway (you can't see our house from the street), so I look through the window, to see our neighbors standing there are smiling with a cooler full o' beer, and EVIL GIRL SPAWN with toys!!!!!! Oh god, there is nowhere to hide, Satan has opened the door and evil girl spawn is beginning to run amuck in my house!!! AAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

Oh, I am thinking in my head, oh Satan, you are soooo dead when they leave, as you conveniently forgot to tell me you had invited them over!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, I am in my grubby laundry day sweats and I haven't washed my hair, no makeup (gee I am the epitome of sexy at that moment) and I am thinking I haven't even been grocery shopping today, so there is nothing to feed these people......

Anyway, they sit down, and I think ok, I could be totally evil, and go in my office and close the door, but that wouldn't be too good, as we do have our neighbors look after our girls when we are on vacation, so I better be nice vampy...... so I go and sit by Satan on the couch, and give him the evil eye as I walk by to sit down....he of course is oblivious to my evil glare as he is chatting with dude neighbor.....so chick neighbor is trying to corral evil girl spawn as she is running around picking up all the skulls that are at evil girl spawn height. She then tries to pick up the candles that are at evil girl spawn height (no they weren't lit, damn!)

And now, what is this, Satan and dude neighbor decide to go out on our back deck and have a smoke, leaving me to make small talk (which I do not do, because I hate it, and I am not good at it either) with chick neighbor and evil girl spawn. So we try and chat about my freakish work and school hours, but most of the time is spent watching chick neighbor run up and down my house after evil girl spawn......(what the fuck Satan, don't leave me here in the house with this!!)

So they finally come back inside, and after about an hour they decide that evil girl spawn is too much and they should be going....(uh, yeah).....

As you can imagine, after they left, I said to Satan:
Me:, what the fuck???? Do you think you could tell me next time you invite people over!!!!! Satan: But I did tell you........
Me: When??? I think I would have remembered if you told me that there would be an evil spawn in my house!!
Satan: Oh, yeah, hmmmm, well I thought I told you.........
Me: You will pay Satan, you will pay...
Satan: (smiles an evil grin and laughs)


Oh by the way Satan, remember the waxing......yeah, well, I didn't forget......and the wax is nice and ready now.....muhahahahahahhahahhaah!!!!!!!!!

*****coven photos have been updated******