I hate going to parties that I don't know anyone, except for Satan. I have stranger anxiety problems. Tonight we (or should I say Satan) has been invited to a birthday party for one of his customers. I just get to tag along being I am "the wife".
It wouldn't be soo bad, if I knew another person, and if I was comfortable in my "own" skin around strangers. I hate the whole, hi, how are you, who are you....so what do you do? How do you know _____, oh your Satan's wife...... Crap that comes with meeting people at parties. I absolutely hate small talk. If I don't know you, I am not the person to just start talking just to talk. It could be because half the time, I just don't care enough to get to know these people. I will never see them again, and it is a waste of time.
Liz said to use it as a good marketing tool for my biznezz. However, that means I have to talk to these people, and of course today, the hermit in me just wants to stay home. But of course this would make Satan upset, as I have blown so many of these parties off before, that I really can't do it again to the poor lad. Satan, unlike me, is very outgoing, loves to go to parties and mingle. I can say this is about the only thing, we really are total opposites on.
So I was thinking I could make some shit up....Have my whole persona created, and if I am totally a freak (which wouldn't be a stretch) I wouldn't be invited to these again.
So what is my story.....
so how do you know -----(person who's party this is),
Me: "oh, I don't....I am just really good at breaking into gated communities. And I cracked this gate code. And I saw free food."
"So what do you do?"
Me: " Oh, I am a klepto....I also like to steal things from rich people's houses. And when I am not doing that, I like scaring little children..........."
So you are Satan's wife, how long have you guys known each other?
Me: "Oh, I am really not his wife, I'm just his whore..."
Great party don't you think?
Me: "no, this party sucks! I'm going home!"
Oh yeah, hopefully, this is the last party I will be invited to!!!
And I took this from Mz. Bunny's blog:
You Are Subversion!
You are systematic and secretive. Sometimes even very calculating. Most everyone trusts you but they have no idea what really goes on in your head. You are capable of being nice or mean, whatever a situation calls for. You look out for #1.